“Remembering” Shabbos should be a part of our lives. It is the vehicle by which we come closer to Hashem. How can we squander a moment? How can we fail to remember? This mitzvah is followed by the commandment to honor one’s parents. The juxtaposition of these two mitzvos upon one another (they are repeated in Parashas Kedoshim, Vayikra 19:3), in which both mitzvos are included in the same pasuk) implies a special relationship between the two. The fact that in Vayikra, they follow after the enjoinment of Kedoshim tiheyu, “You shall be holy,” indicates that, although every mitzvah consecrates us as it elevates us spiritually, these two mitzvos each has a unique character which transports us to a higher realm. While it stands to reason that this idea applies to the sacredness of Shabbos, kibbud av v’eim, honoring one’s parents, is a common sense mitzvah which should be classified as a “no-brainer.”
The Zohar HaKadosh (3:81, cited by Horav Gamliel Rabinowitz, Shlita) states that Hashem equates His Holiness to the sanctity of these two mitzvos. Thus, if a person is meticulous in honoring his parents and takes great care to properly observe Shabbos – he will become very holy.
Having established that these two mitzvos share a similar form of sacredness, it is logical that one who honors his parents will be able to better observe Shabbos. Understandably, one who is careful to observe these two mitzvos will merit siyata di’Shmaya, Divine assistance, in distancing himself from sin.
The Tanna D’vei Eliyahu writes that kibbud av v’eim precedes shemiras Shabbos (in Parashas Kedoshim) in order to teach us that if a person honors his parents, even if he is lax or deficient in his Shabbos observance – he will eventually be forgiven. This is a powerful statement. Chillul Shabbos is one of the most serious sins. To assert that one may be forgiven for chillul Shabbos just because he honors his parents boggles the mind.
The Gemorah and Midrashim cite a number of examples of Tanaaim and Amoraim who meticulously honored their parents. Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai states (Succah 45b): “I could exempt every person in the world from judgment, from the day I was created until today. If my son, Elazar, joins me we could exempt everyone who was created from the beginning of the world until today. If Yosam ben Uriyahu joined, we could exempt every person from the beginning of time until the end of time.” Rashi explains that Yosam was a humble and righteous king who honored his father to the fullest letter of the law. Indeed, when his father was afflicted with leprosy and could no longer function as king, Yosam did not actively take over the position. He continued as a dayan, judge, and would always attribute his judgments to his father. We derive from here the tremendous merit one derives from carrying out the mitzvah of Kibbud av v’eim. Yosam’s merit was powerful enough to exempt the world from judgment from the time of Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai until the end of time. That being the case, it is easier for us to comprehend how kibbud av v’eim can expiate even the transgression of chillul Shabbos. Nonetheless, I think the rationale is quite simple. One who honors his parents, but disgraces Hashem (through chillul Shabbos), indicates that his kibbud av is neither exemplary nor real. Is Hashem any “less” of a father than one’s mortal father? Where do we draw the line on fatherhood? One who rejects Hashem as his father, who does not take into consideration that he owes Hashem much more than he owes his mortal father, conscientiously rejects the spirit of the mitzvah of kibbud av v’eim. In order to carry out the mitzvah without deficiency, we must understand and acknowledge the mitzvah of shmiras Shabbos k’hilchasa. We just have no other way.
Horav Avraham Mattisyahu, zl, of Stefanest, a scion of the Ruzhiner Chassidic dynasty, was known as a miracle worker. As such, people – regardless of their religious affiliation – came from far and wide to petition his blessing. Indeed, his grave, which is in Givatayim (east of Tel Aviv), is a place that is frequented by many who pray and seek his intercession on their behalf. A young man once approached him for a blessing to save him from conscription into the army. The Rebbe asked him if his reason for not going to the army was that he feared being forced to eat non-kosher food. The man replied that neither eating non-kosher nor desecrating Shabbos troubled him as he was clearly not religious. The issue revolved around his responsibility for his mother’s care. She was elderly, and he was her sole caregiver. No one would attend to her needs the way observe these two mitzvos will merit siyata di’Shmaya, Divine assistance, in distancing himself from sin.
The Tanna D’vei Eliyahu writes that kibbud av v’eim precedes shemiras Shabbos (in Parashas Kedoshim) in order to teach us that if a person honors his parents, even if he is lax or deficient in his Shabbos observance – he will eventually be forgiven. This is a powerful statement. Chillul Shabbos is one of the most serious sins. To assert that one may be forgiven for chillul Shabbos just because he honors his parents boggles the mind.
The Gemorah and Midrashim cite a number of examples of Tanaaim and Amoraim who meticulously honored their parents. Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai states (Succah 45b): “I could exempt every person in the world from judgment, from the day I was created until today. If my son, Elazar, joins me we could exempt everyone who was created from the beginning of the world until today. If Yosam ben Uriyahu joined, we could exempt every person from the beginning of time until the end of time.” Rashi explains that Yosam was a humble and righteous king who honored his father to the fullest letter of the law. Indeed, when his father was afflicted with leprosy and could no longer function as king, Yosam did not actively take over the position. He continued as a dayan, judge, and would always attribute his judgments to his father. We derive from here the tremendous merit one derives from carrying out the mitzvah of Kibbud av v’eim. Yosam’s merit was powerful enough to exempt the world from judgment from the time of Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai until the end of time. That being the case, it is easier for us to comprehend how kibbud av v’eim can expiate even the transgression of chillul Shabbos. Nonetheless, I think the rationale is quite simple. One who honors his parents, but disgraces Hashem (through chillul Shabbos), indicates that his kibbud av is neither exemplary nor real. Is Hashem any “less” of a father than one’s mortal father? Where do we draw the line on fatherhood? One who rejects Hashem as his father, who does not take into consideration that he owes Hashem much more than he owes his mortal father, conscientiously rejects the spirit of the mitzvah of kibbud av v’eim. In order to carry out the mitzvah without deficiency, we must understand and acknowledge the mitzvah of shmiras Shabbos k’hilchasa. We just have no other way.
Horav Avraham Mattisyahu, zl, of Stefanest, a scion of the Ruzhiner Chassidic dynasty, was known as a miracle worker. As such, people – regardless of their religious affiliation – came from far and wide to petition his blessing. Indeed, his grave, which is in Givatayim (east of Tel Aviv), is a place that is frequented by many who pray and seek his intercession on their behalf. A young man once approached him for a blessing to save him from conscription into the army. The Rebbe asked him if his reason for not going to the army was that he feared being forced to eat non-kosher food. The man replied that neither eating non-kosher nor desecrating Shabbos troubled him as he was clearly not religious. The issue revolved around his responsibility for his mother’s care. She was elderly, and he was her sole caregiver. No one would attend to her needs the way he did, and, if he were to be drafted, no one would attend to her. When the Rebbe heard this, he declared with great emotion, “If you are, indeed, performing such a great mitzvah, I promise you will be spared from the army.” He was not drafted, as a result of kibbud av v’eim.
